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Despite day to day dealing with exceptionally talented and bright professionals, it remains that legal recruitment is not immune to poor CVs. Thankfully we are well equipped to advise and suggest (politely) some “revisions” or whole scale re-drafts.
As it is Christmas and everyone gears up for the festive season, I thought I would take a lighter approach to my blog. Many of these I had seen before and without doubt, the majority have a leaning to the US, however they still invoke a smile for the tenacity and often down right idiocy of the CVs content. That said, on a personal level, I have some admiration for their work. One hopes they all now have jobs albeit not in positions of significant responsibility. So, below are a few examples of the worst CVs (there may actually be worse out there) ever sent – I hope they amuse and give pause for reflection that, even when you aren’t sure how good your CV looks, there will always be ones in worse shape:
1. An excellent CV submitted by a chap called Eric who heralded himself as someone who would “claw my way to the top using any means necessary” but would then be “a fair and just ruler”. My personal favourite is listing “a very fast metabolism” under experience. I think we all wished we had that experience, especially at this time of year.
2.When applying for a role to JP Morgan, one University graduate chose to ignore his otherwise excellent academic profile to focus on wider attributes he considered fundamental to his dream job. More specifically, his ability to lift twice his bodyweight and do 35 pull-ups. Admittedly, impressive skills but perhaps not as essential to a role in finance as the emphasis placed upon it might suggest.
3.My favourite – and perhaps not entirely as appropriate as it should be, was the listing of one candidate’s skills which set out, in bullet points (quite well I might add) their role in what appeared to be a client facing role with significant responsibility for cash handling which transpired to be drug dealing. Full credit to the candidate in question who had listed such skills under the heading “Marijuana Dealer and Nefarious Dude”. The creative heading alone should have landed him the job.
We hope always to provide a tailored service to your experience and needs and we know and understand what law firms (and the subtleties that can exist between different firms) are looking for. We are on hand to help at all levels – I hope your CV isn’t in as a bad a shape as some of those above but either way we can help to make sure you put your best foot forward.
Have a great Christmas and New Year and I look forward to working with in 2016.
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